Frustrations of a stay at home mum

I have been blessed with the arrival of a newborn. The miracle of life never ceases to amaze. He is a beautiful creature that I never tire of admiring.

Yet I am confronting a dark and sombre period. Winter is here and that in itself brings about a sombre mood.

I seethe with rage everytime a stranger ask 'So what do you do for a living?' quizzically. I struggle with my response. The simple response being that I am a stay at home mum and that has all sorts of negative connotations embedded in it.

I am educated yet I am a particularly young mum with two toddlers and a newborn in tow. This is unusual if not to say a march against the tide and trend of today. It is unheard of that women who have fought so long to gain equality in the workforce with men can now relinquish what they have battled for and regress into the age of women who are nothing more than domesticated cattle who as a matter of course stay at home occupying housework and the raising of children.

I love the luxury of being able to watch my children grow everyday and realise that not many women are as lucky as I. Another part of me long to be able to do something more productive and valued in the ordinary sense, that is use my faculties to affect change and earn my keep at the same time.

I tread on this thin line of being exhilarated and down in the deeps of a self-evaluated worthlessness.

What I dread most is being Mrs ... without any rights to be my own person or woman entitled to being evaluated as a valued employee or credited with a job well done or having a capable intellect. What _I want is to be considered more than a simple minded housewife and uninteresting stay at home mum.
I do miss having a circle of supportive network here in Geneva. I have yet to establish links with the natives that go beyond mere acquaintances or convenient friends. I have found however a few friends whom I can sympathise/empathise and discuss my frustrations with. However I do not have a pillar of strength which is paramount to staying positive during this emotionally charged and tumultous (hormonally speaking) time. My husband throughout the three pregnancies have not been a tower of strength. I felt that he either spoke for me as if I needed a spokesperson before, during and post-partum. I can say that I've had the episiotomy stitches, childbirth pain and post-partum uterus contractions à travers the three pregnancies. I think it is not intentional on his part but he is ultimately a man and cannot empathise with what is uniquely a feminine experience that is different for every woman and different still with each new pregnancy. The husband made jokes which at the moment of excruciating pain did not seem all that funny to me. Maybe my sense of humour failed to see the light in the tunnel of pain but needless to say that his way of trying to lighten the mood did not go down well with me agonising.
What I really dislike is the post-partum question: So how are you ? Was it very painful? to which my husband answers with a decisive 'Oh it went fine, a birth punctuated with nothing out of the ordinary'. I would like to be able to tell it from my perspective so people do not mistake that the birth was all dandy indeed without any hitches. The end result though overrides all that pain and perhaps I do forget that it was hell when I was experiencing childbirth pain that stretched my pelvic floor however elastic it might be.

The lack of mental stimulation I experience while interacting with the kids is refreshing for its intense freshness and disarming innocence and yet tests my own limits of patience at the same time.

I resent the routine that staying at home entails mountains of laundry, cleaning after the kids endlessly, cooking and more cleaning...

I've been greeted with the baby blues...
I think I need to uplift my mood and am afraid that no amount of chocolate or other comfort food eating will do.

What is a desperate mum to do ?
This post has rather been highly therapeutic and that somehow eases my tristesse and gives me hope that I will overcome this with perhaps the help of a more tactful hubby who after having read this post will hopefully be more supportive and more understanding.

Seasons

Winter blues
Grey hues
Harsh winds render impossible the sprouting of buds

Orientation of the yellow fireball
pivoting towards lumiere

Blossoming buds
Chlorophyll tainted foliage

A new coat of paint
Song of birds praising nature's renewal

Intensifying canicule
Blinding light that imparts difficult rest and repose
Unending scintillation stretching the length of day


Changing colours
Pretty yellow hues and crimson foliage

The circle loops
Life begins anew in the cycle of seasonal change

WII

Too much exposure to Wii in the past two days have made me slightly nauseous and hoarse from all the screaming and cheering I did to support Donkey.

Shrek has created two uncontrollable monsters having introduced the Wii console into our household.

HELP!!!

Hibernation

The cold weather has really brought about a hivernale feel aka winter is here!!! It is awfully hard to get out of bed in the morning and unless one has got to be somewhere like work or school, one would infinitely prefer to stay in bed.

Hibernation is what animals do when the chills arrive and we as humans are no different. We are animals even if we would like to think of ourselves as some sort of superior being because we have the faculties and capacity to think.

I am finding it difficult to compose, create or be motivated. I am affected by the weather darnit. I am a summer person or at the very least spring. Autumn and winter just makes me want to hibernate and wake up when spring is here once again.

Other than the long winded essay on hibernation I have not got a lot to post about.

Back to the nice warm bed with the doona 'tis.

This post was just a post for post's sake

Shrek has saved pancakes

In the long running saga that is Shrek's attempt to make pancakes, Fiona has to concede that Shrek has made good his pancakes. They are still not the traditional or conventional pancakes that one would be used to but they are not half bad.

Shrek uses levure de boulangerie sec. (dry yeast)

Shrek has celebrated this by ritually making Sundays 'Pancake day'

Shrek the marron chaud !!

I have to give it to Shrek for he makes delectable and to die for 'marrons chauds'.

Bravo Shrekkie :)

marrons chauds = roasted chestnuts

Shrek the pancake breaker !

Shrek cannot make pancakes to save himself if his life depended on it as evidenced by a second non-successful attempt effectuated two Sundays ago.
Donkey did not let this opportunity to humiliate Shrek of his shortcoming go to waste. Donkey punctuated this failed attempt with 'Shrek has made crêpes', 'Shrek has made crêpes once again' when he used ingredients that should have yielded pancakes according to a recipe which Fiona had meticulously google.
Chat botté was being neutral and did not add insult to injury. She kept quiet as she knows not to raise the ire or stir her father into a frenzy.
Donkey being a vociferous and at times caustic chatterbox that he is revels at the slightest chance of shredding Shrek's onion layers and giving Fiona fits of uncontrollable chuckle worthy of the tears caused by peeling of onion skins.

Shrek being the pig-headed ogre that he is insisted that the flour did not need to be sifted and that measurements were useless instead he added 'only god knows how much' amount of milk, flour, baking powder etc... This method strangely enough works marvelously when he makes crêpes but pancakes are a different sort of 'hot cake' altogether.

Shrek 0 Team Fiona 2

Shrek

Introducing the Shrek family.

Starring:

My hubby as Shrek
Myself as Princess Fiona
Petit Suisse as Donkey
Petite Suissesse as Chat Botté (Cat in Boots but I prefer the French synonym)

To be continued with exciting episodes.

The idea of the Shrek family came from the kids who think the personages/characters fit us like gloves or almost...

I wanted to share this amusing image with you all.
The sperm bank surely needs lots more donors so... Come and be thanked

IKEA

You know you are a regular at IKEA when all the employees in the daycare at their store recognise your son and know him on a first name basis without you having opened your mouth to ask which child you are fetching.