Perseverance

Lil Miss N tends to be discouraged all too soon as exhibited in two incidents described henceforth : she was practising her violon when she slouched and played like a cricket croaking without any effort whatsoever, Petit Suisse made smart-alec* comments such as 'C'est nul, tu fais tout faux' and her reaction was to just give up and bawl her eyes out... all the while complaining that Je ne serai jamais capable de jouer au violon

the second involved her braiding woolen strings into a bracelet, she stumbled and made one or two consecutive mistake and decided that she had had enough and toss the unfinished bracelet into the garbage bin.

Shrek had one of those fortifying talks to Lil Miss N to iron out any self-doubts she might have been harbouring.

As a kid Shrek was not given opportunities to learn to play a musical instrument or have very many extra-curricular activities outside of school. Given that we do our best to give our kids exposure to and the opportunity to learn musical instruments the very least is to give it their best shot and persevere. Practice and effort makes perfect although we are not in any way aiming for perfection, I do aim to give them a well-rounded education with music, literature, scientific discoveries and philosophy. They can then decide what they want to do with all that knowledge and know-how but the most important lesson Shrek and I want to instil into our kids is 'perseverance'. Perseverance is a virtue unto itself but more than being virtuous it is a dogged approach to life that can 'keep them moving forward' borrowed from the 'Robinsons'

Mise au point

I bought Shrek a cadeau : a Garmin GPS navigation system approximately three months ago. I bought it primarily for him but it was also en guise un cadeau for me : La Paix.

Let me clarify Shrek goes ballistic in the car when I (hopeless as a map reader and co-pilot that I am) get us lost without fail. I wanted to eradicate my pain and eliminate this unwanted recurrence by gifting him with the GPS and what I thought would be La Paix for me...Alas Shrek has some major idiosyncrasies that I do not and cannot even begin to fathom and he has refused to put the GPS into use. It is as we speak sitting prettily in its box and emballage original unable to function the way it was destined for. Shrek prefers me to learn how to read a map properly and would gladly gift me with the poisonous gift of 'A crashcourse in map reading and comprehension for dummies'.

He did indeed go spastic when I got us lost on our way to the water theme park.

I have made it clear that I do not condone inadmissive behaviour from him and thus have declared a sanction. Shrek needs to learn quickly that his bullying is not working !

There I said my piece and now I leave it up to the borné master to start some work on himself.

Borné personalisé is Shrek's first name.

For what it's worth

I have learnt my lesson. It is a very important and costly lesson that needs to be passed onto my children immediately.

When you overstuff an upright freezer with full capacity and leave it for three weeks unattended subjected to the heatwave of an impossible hellfire and return to discover that over the course of your abandon the freezer has contracted and expanded leaving it permanently opened to intruders of the heated kind and bacteria being impregnated/penetrated its defences, your husband of impossibly impeccable logic will have no choice but to trash the whole contents of the freezer thereby effectively throwing out more than 300 CHF's worth of alimentation (monetary value) down the drain. Never mind that one had meticulously prepared with affection meals which took hours and since time is money the net worth of all that sweat and tears and effort and such could end up being in the thousands. A very expensive and painful lesson to learn indeed.

My biggest vice that leads to my downfall sometime is greed.

I hope I have cleared up any doubts and have assisted my children in avoiding such a costly mistake in the future. As for me it is a hard lesson to swallow and digest but I have it down pat now !!!

Although I do believe Shrek should have taken photographic proof thereby leaving me with no lingering doubts and also it would be priceless to include a photo of the hard evidence.

Message for my kids !

People who have more money than you are not necessarily smarter or richer (in the all encompassing sense of the word) or better in any way. They simply have more money and as a result may possess more material stuff than you.

It is not material things that will make anyone happy. We all need basic necessities and we need to also feel loved. One needs to have grounding and to feel grounded and balance. We all strive for success and material things but that will not necessarily fulfil us nor should it define who we are. One needs to keep in mind and be mindful of what the most important priorities in life are.

To love and be loved alone cannot feed our mouths, it only feeds our souls. We need material things in order to fulfil our physical beings but to overwhelm our beings with material gain and consumerism and to always seek to attain bigger, moreish and to keep up with the Joneses will render us ultimately unhappy.

To cite a case of the hapless poor little rich girl: a heiress of J&J dynasty died alone, friendless and with only rats as her companions. She died a lonely, wasteful and pointless death because she was crying out for attention and all the money and associated fame that was bestowed on her brought her downfall because she did not need to work for a living, did not need to earn her keep hence was infutilely partying her way and drugging herself to death. This is a reductionist theory and perhaps an oversimplified version. Life is much more complex and complicated than that but I simplify so that one can draw conclusions and life lessons from her example.

Work is sometime underestimated. One needs to feel useful by contributing in some way and to nurture and nourish our propensity to yearn and reach for a higher place but lest we forget where we came from and what makes us whole.


The moral of the story and the ultimate lesson I want to pass on to all of my four children is that having honourable work ethics is important. We need to contribute and participate positively and to feel that we are indeed useful and relevant and self-sufficient and having everything handed to you on a platter will only spoil you from the core. Having all the money and material objects in the world should not be one's lifelong goal. One should strive for a balance of having access to money and living comfortably (noone can define exactly what this level of comfortableness should be) and it differs for different people and yet maintaining our personal relationships with others around us and most of all preserve our self-knowledge and to always be proud of where we came from and what makes us whole.

Mummy and daddy love you all always and we hope that you our children will grow up to be self-sufficient, proud, positive contributors to society and happy adults who will in turn raise more full and well rounded individuals (perchance the case may be).

Murphy's laws cont'ed

No matter the number of reuseable paper shopping bags in our possession : at home or in the car, Shrek will invariably have the need to buy yet another one because of one of the following reasons forgetfulness. The numerous bags sit idly and await their chance to become useful but we always leave them at home or in the boot of our car.

Needless to say our burgeoning collection of useless paper bags never end.

Susceptibility to laziness

As human beings we are all and without exception prone to laziness. We are motivated by material gain, survival instincts and desire to attain credibility and relevance.

If left to our own devices and if we could afford to pay someone else or depend on others to support us financially and otherwise we all would.

Life unfortunately is cruel and hence we have to work in order to survive. My philosophy is that we are all born lazy and in order to overcome inertia one has to make an effort. Shrek's inertia and tendency to procrastinate needs lots of nudging and nagging. Shrek would happily sleep, eat and fulfil his pleasure if things were left up to him. He is more than capable of simply lazing around, fortunately I am there to push Shrek and my children into action. Allez hop allez hop.

We have a saying in our household : Get up you lazy lump of lard and hop to it !

Important lesson for people prone to maniacal behaviour

A house is only a home if it is lived in and incidentally will have messes, dirt and dust.

A home is not a museum to be admired or an altar to be worshipped.

Incidentally if a home is lived in it will contain objects, junk and in general will be occupied, i.e. it will not have a whole lot of empty spaces, given that it is best if a home is not too cluttered but nevertheless it needs to be reiterated that I do not consider a house that is empty save for a few essentials a home. If the kitchen is always spotless one must wonder if it is ever used for cooking at all, if a living room is spotless then is it ever 'lived in', if a bed is perfectly made and it is covered with plastic to prevent dust from settling is it ever 'slept in'. If no dust ever settles then is it a home where people are living or is it dead space that is perfectly calm, perfectly devoid of all traces of life.

Life is not about having no clutter, spotlessness, cleanliness and emptiness. It is about spending quality time with others and interacting with your wife or spouse or companion and kids or by extension family and friends while one still can.A house that is orderly, tidy and neat without a single hair out of place is not a celebration of life but a celebration of stillness. Once we are gone it is already way too late. Time waits for no man. If we waste our time worrying about inessentials like how we can better improve our homes or surroundings but not our relationships with people around us then is all that fretting and worrying over trivial and trite things really worth it ???

If you insist on having a perfectly clean, spotless house then consider living in a museum. I challenge anyone who is game to try it. I am directing this at a certain somebody who shall remain unnamed. They know who they are...

Murphy's laws bis

No matter the price paid for pairs of stockings I will always invariably end up with ladders in them.

Kids never waste your hard earned dough on buying expensive pairs of stockings that will end up ripping no matter how careful you are in handling them and caring for them. I have resolved to buy the cheapest brand and not regret the fact that it's only after the first use and I already have ladders.

Rotten chestnuts

It might sound trite and conceited but I have not learnt my lesson and so committed the faux pas of buying marrons when it is not in season as yet. It was a horrendous batch with more than half rotten and inedible and the rest barely passable. Most of all the skin did not peel off easily eventhough it has been roasted in a skillet. It was a waste of time, money spent and waste of stomach space. Petit Suisse who is a keen roasted chestnut fiend (aka marrons chauds) and self proclaimed avid fan told me to finish consuming the chestnuts because he could not swallow the awful batch. He usually wolfs down faster than I can peel them so if he turns away in disgust it means that the marrons were beyond repair.
The end of the season of anything also spells disaster beyond reprimand.

It is one lesson to always buy seasonal produce : taste wise it is better and more cost effective.

This general rule of thumb applies to all fresh fruits, vegetables and produce in general.

No exceptions to this rule whatsoever.

TB The photo displays what successful marrons chauds should look like,

Award scheme

I have devised a new system at home. Petit Suisse and Lil Miss N are to receive 2 stickers of their choice after one week of good behaviour, good marks/achievements and concerted efforts toward their schoolwork and or tyding up and helping out at home.

This is an effective tool because the rolls of 1000 stickers I just bought will come in handy. They can each have a log book and will be able to stick their stickers in one of the three columns 'Behaviour', 'Achievements' and 'Efforts'. It will give them a sense of responsibility . It encourages hopefully cooperation and instils a sense of pride in themselves.

There will be follow up reports of how that goes.

Gluttony is a vice

I have learnt today after discovering a package of pre-washed and pre-cut salad mix has gone rotten that sometime it does not pay to be greedy when it comes to buying certain fresh foods...mostly prepped salad.


The lesson is to not let half-priced fresh produce go to waste by leaving it for more than two days. It is to be consumed preferably immediately or at most a day later but under no circumstances should it be left to its own devices in the vegetable compartment for too long.

Lesson learnt after having wasted 2.15 CHF.

Important lesson

I have learnt the hard way a very valuable lesson re cooking/baking
My first attempt at recreating 'pots de crème de chocolat' was a complete dud because I wanted a healthy and lighter version and substituted 'low fat cream' instead of using full cream. This rendered the cream runny and yuck... I can only learn from this mistake and advise people that if you are on a health kick and want nothing to do with sugar and cream, stay away from desserts. Low fat and healthy desserts are just not worth the pain. There is no way good 'crème' or cakes etc can taste good if you use low fat instead of full cream...

cream mmmm miam miam

I cannot know wot possessed me to substitute and make the ultimate mistake but I will not be repeating the same mistake next time. Stick to sugar, butter (real butter, no substitutes) and cream and one cannot go wrong.

Don't skim on the fat and sugar when it comes to sweets and treats. They would not be treats if they tasted like cardboard now would they ?