Borné

Shrek's attempt at cooking pancakes has turned out just as I had predicted. He was given 'une épreuve de la dernière chance', c-a-d c'etait sa mission de prouver qu'il est capable de faire des pancakes à son façon. He copied and adjusted my recipe (which was foolproof til Shrek came along), he tweaked it and in the process ruined it.

He had sneakily set out his masterplan of elongating our wait hence heightening our hunger pangs thereby reducing our tastebuds' discerning abilities : who can truly judge how delicious something really is when you've just come out of an imposed hunger strike ? Unfortunately for Shrek his strategy did not succeed and hence he was left to languish in his sorrowing defeat.

His secret weapon (as he was persuaded that it would make all the difference in the world) was 'yeast' (levure de boulangère/naturale). He added a packed of this to two cups of white flour, two cups of milk, two eggs, several teaspoons of baking powder (he ommitted to measure the amount), pinch of salt, approximately one tablespoon of sugar and his secret weapon and let it rise for almost two hours. The final result speaks volumes for itself. I shall definitely not follow his recipe. The verdict from discerning and finicky judges such as Petit Suisse, Lil Miss N and Baby Ben was that it was edible but less than desirable on a scale of deliciousness or yummy.

His pancakes were doughy, bland and heavy not at all light, fluffy and airy like the pancakes one would expect a tried and tested recipe to produce. I do have to credit him for successfully managing to create holes (les trous) or crater faced pikelet-like in appearance oddly-shaped thingymagic. His pancakes as he claims are unique and resemble nothing I have ever seen. I have to congratulate him on originality but taste-wise it was universally PANNED !

Victoire declaré à celle qui merite le plus : tada MOI

Take that Shrekkie

Princess Fiona aka moi 1 Shrek 0

It was a knockout defeat !!!!!!!

KAPOW

I have to stress the importance of this victory because time and again I have proved Shrek wrong and yet he insists in his blinded borné ways : he is eccentric which can be a loveable trait only if he knows when to stop holding onto the shredded and frayed fragments of his methods and persuasions. He is a borné creature by nature and he still persists even if he knows deep down that it will lead him astray because he is stubborn and pig-headed like that, isn't that right Shrek ?

Gross

Pommes acidulés et riz créole are Shrek's top two public nemesis and henceforth shall be bani de notre maison.

Let me keep that firmly in mind in case I ever get the urge or temptation to buy these two barely edible subjects again.

Damn Daims

I have learnt another rather important lesson
Daim : glorified chocolate covered toffees/caramels are not only frighteningly bad for your teeth but they are the hotbeds or breeding ground for worms and bebêtes.
I will refrain from buying them and think thrice before even considering the possibility of bringing such garbage home again.

Bête noir

I do not know what it is exactly but the numerous attempts at creating an aromatic and flavourful Bun bo Hue has always fallen short of expectation. It is a recipe which I have yet to master and am close to just giving it all up. I deplore the lack of fresh ingredients which I can access in Geneva but in my humble opinion have still a long way to go before I perfect this dish. It is disconcerting because eventhough I do not like bun bo Hue all that much (which is another incentive for me to just give up already) I do want to attempt to at least make a decently satisfying version of it which has evaded me and yesterday was no exception.

I will definitely attempt it again when I have my mum babysitting kids so I can concentrate and not rush hence ruin my effort.

I will post pictures of the satisfying results.

Biological lesson

There are three factors that affect the degradability of food hence rendering it unfit for consumption.

These are temperature, time and humidity. It is said that at room temperature (it is aggravated in summer) natural humidity induced by the presence of moisture in food is an incubator for bacteria to develop.

At room temperature and with a normal ambient level of humidity (presence of water or other cooking liquid) the critical time is 12 hours. After said period has elapsed it is mandatory that one throw said food out.

I should have this lesson down pat by now but it seems that for some inexplicable reason (frugality perhaps) I still have not learnt my lesson.

It is a delicate subject matter.

Oh well as it is often said 'You are what you eat' I will proceed to improving this aspect.

I expect Shrek to improve certain aspects of his 'idiosyncracies' as well.

I want to pass on this important lesson to my children and hope that they will not have to endure the same predicament as me.

Important lesson

I have learnt the hard way a very valuable lesson re cooking/baking
My first attempt at recreating 'pots de crème de chocolat' was a complete dud because I wanted a healthy and lighter version and substituted 'low fat cream' instead of using full cream. This rendered the cream runny and yuck... I can only learn from this mistake and advise people that if you are on a health kick and want nothing to do with sugar and cream, stay away from desserts. Low fat and healthy desserts are just not worth the pain. There is no way good 'crème' or cakes etc can taste good if you use low fat instead of full cream...

cream mmmm miam miam

I cannot know wot possessed me to substitute and make the ultimate mistake but I will not be repeating the same mistake next time. Stick to sugar, butter (real butter, no substitutes) and cream and one cannot go wrong.

Don't skim on the fat and sugar when it comes to sweets and treats. They would not be treats if they tasted like cardboard now would they ?

Making fish tasty

According to the wise and sage Petit Suisse one can render fish enjoyable for children's consumption simply by covering it with breadcrumbs and deep-frying it. This can be narrowed down to 'fish sticks' or 'bâtonnets de poissons'.


He learned this clever trick from his school canteen.
I am so relieved that my children are eating healthy and nutritious meals at their canteen. I have such confidence and absolute trust in their cuisine.

(my tongue firmly in cheek)

The growing list of inedibles

I have discovered yet again another chalky cheese to add to my list. This time it is a Tessinois cheese by the name of Lati. Avoid it at all costs.

Another malediction is the unfathomably horrible apple variety drumrolls 'Pommes (Canada) Reinnettes' It is simply gross. Eat it at your own peril. It was barely palatable when juiced using the centrifugeuse/Solis juice extractor and normally any fruit or veggie is rendered rather delectable when passed through the juicer. The resulting juice resembled an ugly coloured 'liquid caca'. Needless to say that I have been traumatised for life by the Pomme Reinnette and will never dare to buy this variety again. It would serve as a great case against all apples. It has my vote for worst apple/fruit variety.