Obsessions

According to Petit Suisse

Shrek is obsédé par du travail albeit work. He would be the hardest working man on Earth.

Princess Fiona aka Effacée in CH : moi is obsédée par l'ordinateur and la cuisine because as luck would have it I am busy looking and researching recipes online and then churning out delish food (and sometime disastrious experiments) for the ever hungry pack of wolves : les faims des loups. Petit Suisse by far is becoming more and more ravaged by hunger or he is in that exponential growing phrase which dictates that the input no matter the quantity will be digested as soon as he has finished eating. I feel like I am forever putting food on the table, clearing the table and loading the dish-washer, emptying the dishwasher, cleaning the kitchen and so on and so forth...

Petit Suisse is obsédé by la television and a whole host of other jeux which includes Beyblade Metal Fusion toupies, now folding and flying paper airplanes to be replaced by a new obsession soon enough. Obsessions at Petit Suisse's age are fickle and easily replaceable. The older one gets the more ingrained the obsessions become until it is a well worn habit that is hard to kick.

Biological lesson

There are three factors that affect the degradability of food hence rendering it unfit for consumption.

These are temperature, time and humidity. It is said that at room temperature (it is aggravated in summer) natural humidity induced by the presence of moisture in food is an incubator for bacteria to develop.

At room temperature and with a normal ambient level of humidity (presence of water or other cooking liquid) the critical time is 12 hours. After said period has elapsed it is mandatory that one throw said food out.

I should have this lesson down pat by now but it seems that for some inexplicable reason (frugality perhaps) I still have not learnt my lesson.

It is a delicate subject matter.

Oh well as it is often said 'You are what you eat' I will proceed to improving this aspect.

I expect Shrek to improve certain aspects of his 'idiosyncracies' as well.

I want to pass on this important lesson to my children and hope that they will not have to endure the same predicament as me.

Fly on the wall

Call me obsessive compulsive but I cannot stand sharing my turf with flies. I do not mind if I am in the great outdoors and can generally put up with them save the obligatory swats...and curses under my breath but I will not and I repeat will not under any circumstances let them co-exist with me inside my territory i.e. appartment or room. Report me to PETA or whomever but I will remain adamant about my OCB re flies.

Relief

I finally have a break from the routine that was making my life miserable. I need some time to myself and that is exactly what I am getting.

I love Shrek and my kids but being able to have even just an hour to myself to do whatever the hell I please and not answer to anyone is what is needed.

In other words I am enjoying myself and it's a win-win situation for all concerned.

Shrek tends to be uptight and somewhat overprotective at times, maybe too conservative to some even. He needs to loosen up and live a lil.

It's good to be conservative and prudent and careful but being able to have fun and not worry about deadlines, frameworks and limitations imposed by work or daily chores is an ability that Shrek still has not mastered. When one is working one needs order and set rules but when one is on holidays one needs to relax and be spontaneous. He is not exactly the type to live and let live.

(Shrek you do not need to take to heart what has been said here and remember that it is always constructive criticism that is supposed to ensure you improve certain aspects of your character/personality or to give you another perspective that you might not have been aware of)

A holiday to me is epitomised by spontaneity and rest and relaxation which pronounces a difference from the normal daily routine or everyday struggle.

I do miss Shrek terribly.

Differences of opinion

When Shrek and I first got together there were many incompatibilities which oddly enough centred around food, food preparations and the way leftovers are conserved etc..

The unforgettable episode involved an explosion over how vegetables should be cut shortly after we started to live together. This has been burned into my mind and I will never quite get over how grave it seemed at the time. He was convinced that the only way to cut vegetables was how his mother had taught him. I refused to cut it the way his exigency commanded. He demanded that I acquiesce to his authoritarian tyrannical way and so a feud soon followed. Suffice to say that since that memorable (for all the wrong reasons) clash we have come to a compromise about how veggies should be cut. I will cut it the way I see fit whenever I cook. He can cut it however he wants but he will not impose his will onto me without resistance.

Other non less spectacular affairs centred around how unhygienic it was for me to reuse over and over the oil that has been deep-fried and stored for a few weeks. This led to some short-cut chemistry lessons: how bacteria develops even when it is invisible and how no temperature high enough will succeed in disintegrating these persistent toxins. It deeply enriched and enlightened me. Needless to say I was less than thrilled and delighted with how he delivered his lessons and the condescending tone and ensuing belittlement and denigration. He maintained that eventhough I had passed college level chemistry and physics that I was in need of refreshment courses. I felt quite insulted and bullied.

Anyway I have resolved to not accept such behaviour from Shrek. I had to quickly correct him and remind him that due respect had to be given and that I like himself can commit errors and mistakes and we can learn from them but that noone is dispensed to changing overnight their lifelong habits and that some of his habits befuddle and annoy me to no end.

Food for thought and reflection. I hope that we have thoroughly rectified and can slowly move forward by ironing out incompatibilities. Life is a series of compromises. This general rule of thumb applies to all aspects of life: work, family and even pleasure.

A disclaimer: I wanted to record this once and for all. I do not hold grudges for an eternity. I have almost all but forgotten about these events.

Shrek is a Zebra

Shrek's laundry filters have only two colours : black or white. I am worried that he might be colourblind. I have to sort out the clothes: wool, silk or anything that requires a soft wash from the ordinary mostly cotton and polyester and then Shrek will mindless load the washing machine with either black(colours included) or white only vêtements. He has ruined quite a few woollen items of clothing. He should eschew the whole ordeal but he has been rather conscientious lately with his share of household chores/tasks hence he employs his resources in loading but more importantly emptying the washer and hanging of clothes.

One can be a pharmacist but one cannot distinguish between 'fragile' and 'normal' garments. It is the lack of attention to details/a deficit disorder which I might add can generally extend to the whole of the male species.

Shrek's annoying habit

One of the most annoying things Shrek dreads is when somebody dare to put back non-functional (which should have been discarded) office equipment such as ballpoint pens, liquid paper aka Tipp-Ex and so on and so forth into the desk. He then will (because Murphy's Laws dictates) find the futile office supplies when he is in the need of some liquid paper without the requisite brush for instance. What good is a liquid paper bottle when there is no brush? None whatsoever so whoever dared to put it back hoping to recuperate that darn thing will be lectured for at least 20 minutes or so about the futileness of such an act. Their senses will be questioned...They will be forced to squirm as The All-powerful and knowing Shrek points out their deficiency and unreasonableness and question their sense of judgment..

Who knew that by not spending 2 minutes to throw out the said offensive piece of rubbish one will have to endure 20 minutes of hard core lecture from a no-mercy punisher from hell?

One have got to learn one's lessons well.

Do not incite the wrath of Shrek.