Crêpe flipper

Shrek's skilful arms and dextrous hands flipping the crêpe at Chandeler (sic) which happened in February where the French and by extension Swiss farewell the end of winter and cold or welcome/greet verglas (the return of silver frostbites/glazed frost) by having a Crêpes party.

The song goes something like...

Shrek you can post the lyrics in the comments section, ta muchly.

Anyway if your crêpe slips on the side then you will apparently attract bad luck.

My children love Chandeler (sic) and Shrek was happy to oblige. This is backlog but I wanted to share a photo of Shrek skilfully handling the crêpe flipping. Crêpes are one of the few food Shrek has managed with his improvisation that turn out to be quite good. Although the thickness of his crêpes are somewhat irregular, matters not because the kids are fond of Shrek's crêpes and I will more than readily admit I am hopeless at making crêpes...so I leave this task in Shrek's reliably strong arms. What a man yeah !!

Well done

Shrek needs to lighten up

Shrek has an Obsessive Compulsive Disorder when it comes to the kitchen being clutter free and spotless. I think that if a kitchen is used for cooking then it will no doubt at some point have messes, spices, foodstuffs and crockery, cutlery or pots and pans lying around...I mean if it is not being used then surely it will be shining ones reflection in its hallowed surfaces. One use the kitchen to cook and prepare meals not to leave it looking like a barren and lifeless waste of space beckoning respectful worship worthy of deity or icons and espousing the mantra 'Cleanliness is godliness'. I eschew this particular mania. Shrek needs to be reminded all the damn time that if people who dine out all the time and who do not use their kitchens for its sole purpose then they will surely have a kitchen he approves of. Alas if he continues I tell him the painful truth that I will post an advert in 'Meetic' or some other silly 'sites des rencontres like facebook et al' looking for 'une femme, mosh, TOC (French acronym for OCD), qui coud et qui va s'engager à engueler au dessus d'un ogre et qui ressembles à la sœur de Shrek'. This stops him dead in his tracks.


Learn to live with some messes and disorder because the crumbs and litter and rubbish are not going to pick themselves up and throw themselves into bins. I have learned to live and cook with onions and deal with the layers and tears. Shrek it is time you work on yourself...Living with kids mean that there are going to be some disagreements and setbacks and sacrifices...

BTW Shrek has a penchant for and tendency to leave behind a trail of yoghurt pots and his personal effects...without picking up after himself. I can spell h-y-p-o-c-r-i-t-i-c-a-l for you if you'd like Shrek.

Shrek has thrown out my roughly scribbled recipes which I painstakingly modified and had mastered...but had not filed away. I will have to search for the recipes and then make the modifications again...Travail des singes...which Shrek hates with a vengeance.


I think I have vented enough vehemence for the day. I feel justifiably much better now...until the next episode of Shrek's outburst.

Reason why we belong to the poor working class

A photo of what my fridge looks like after having spent 120 Swiss Francs on different sorts of yoghurts, most notably 'Perle de Lait', une specialité laitière Français which we love here at the Lost in Switzerland household. I must say though that having an overdose of such a delish dairy product leaves us less than enthralled. We need to starve for it by only consuming it in small, regulated doses otherwise it loses its charm.

We are big yoghurt consumers as can be deducted from the depiction of our fridge. We go through phases of veggies, fruits, cheese, yoghurts, meats and fishes...

The reason we are poverty stricken is because it is not cheap to feed 'les faims des loups' ah ooooh wah oooooooh and to buy nappies for two overly anally active babies, mostly Ben and Baby Taz to a lesser extent. It will only become more expensive the older and more exigeant and demanding they become.

Physical ed

A curious reading choice by Petit Suisse sees him choosing on his own accord 'The encyclopedia sur la vie sexuelle'. He expects Shrek to accompany him in guiding his understanding of male sexuality and human sexuality in general. They really do start young and are much more precoce than their foreparents.

Newsfeed

Shrek has been rather helpful and placid lately. He has been somewhat transformed, tamed and domesticated much like myself. This analogy is taken directly from his favourite book 'Le petit Prince'.

Bravo Shrek ! Keep up the good work and do not slide back into abominable and lamentable behaviour.

Resume

02.04.03 marked the birth of Petit Suisse and yesterday 02.04.09 was his 6th birthday.

In the six years I have lived in Geneva I have amounted to a resume that consists of but not limited to child bearing, child rearing, housekeeping, nappies changing (I must be in the thousands and counting), breast feeding, reasoning with toddlers and mangling of my mindset at times thanks to Shrek. I steadfastly believe that Shrek took four tries before he even made a slight inroad into a behaviour that was acceptable and harmonious with a hormonally raging mum to be.

Glorious isn't it? Ultra glamorous too given that I ballooned and looked like a bag lady towards the end of my four pregnancies. The fourth and last birth still leaves me with a less than desired flabby figure and a curved round belly which I need to lose. It is going to be a bit of a struggle especially since I do have a weakness for snacking and a sweet tooth prone to indulging... sweets and snacks are my vices...

I know that many women nowadays struggle with infertility and would more than anything in the world wish for the presence of a child but I have the opposite problem: rampant fertility (and I must add Shrek's lack of responsible contraception) interferes with the rest of my projects. I seriously will have a nervous breakdown if I was to find out that I have to deal with more childbirth. Suffice to say I am more than up to my neck in it. I look forward to doing other things and having some breathing space and being more than mum and wife even if I do not have an illustrious career to speak of I can still pursue other interests and read more intelligible literature and intellectual material which I seem to have abandoned since the inception and conception of a series of babies. I feel like a serial mum who has been bogged down by intellectual exhaustion more than anything else.

I do sound like a sour grape and I do not want to complain but in the past I have withheld information and kept up a brave face and then lived to regret that as it meant that I suffered mentally and silently in vain and had no support and could not vent my frustration or anger. It was very unhealthy and I decided once and for all to use my blog as a form of therapy. At least I hope that by doing so I will be the better for my kids and Shrek and my other loved ones. I think in the beginning when Shrek was an insensitive and uncaring (unintentionally perhaps) jerk, I especially did not want my mum to know the real state of affairs.It is a shame my mum lives far away and she feels rather helpless when it comes to me. Being so far away means that I hide my sorrows and she cannot decipher or witness my sadness and desperation. She is worried bout how I get on and I want to reassure her that I am OK.

I would like to educate my children but at the moment it is a highly sporadic effort as Baby Taz and Benben are too small for me to be able to teach. The other problem lies in the fact Baby Taz has a tendency to interfere and to vie for attention (rather understandably so) when I attempt to edify Petit Suisse or Lil Miss N which renders my lessons impossible because noone can concentrate with a screaming baby. When they are all school age I will revel in teaching and enlightening them.

Forever young

What is it about grown women that makes them awww and ahhh at mildly cute but annoying little insidious cartoon characters such as Hello Kitty or Pucca...

Lil Miss N is still at that cutesy stage of being interested in all things hyper girly such as 'Strawberry Shortcake', 'Dora', 'The Powerpuff Girls/Supernanas' or Hello Kitty.

I guess deep down we never really grow up just as Shrek can easily become nostalgic and watch Cobra for hours on end.

There is no harm in childishness after all. Staying young mentally keeps one from keeling over into the abyss of responsible adulthood.

I will sheepishly admit that my daggy self find Hello Kitty and Strawberry Shortcake/Charlotte aux Fraises damn cute and adorable and appealing thus I fall into the category of grown women who strangely find ultra kiddy merchandising and ploys trendy. Maybe Lil Miss N got it from me... that wouldn't be half surprising now would it?

Reassurance of sorts : Mummy first

I have been relieved because the reassurance from Petit Suisse that

Premier: mummy
Deuxieme: son amourette

Mummy's number one and second is his lil puppy love. Besides that there are no others.

I think Petit Suisse had some coercing from Shrek to reassure me that I am not redundant yet.
I don't take anything they say or do at this stage all too seriously. I just find it amusing and one day when my kids are older will remind them of their antics and kiddy ways which hopefully will bring about a smile or hearty laugh. Either way I am convinced that one should see life in a lighthearted manner and be able to laugh at oneself.

Benben's birth

To be accurate and concise as much as possible I have decided to post Ben's delivery while it is still fresh in my mind.

Leading up to D-day I had been experiencing severe pelvis pain which was due to the pressure Ben usurped and exerted upon my uterus. She was apparently very eager and in position to be born.

Just as Shrek and I were finishing up our tax declaration I started to get regular contractions at 10 minute intervals. I waited as instructed by the maternity as there was no imminent birth just yet. I had figured that since it was my fourth delivery it would be relatively painless and rapid. How I was proven wrong from the outset. It was the longest and most straining experience and given all my credentials and experience nothing went according to prediction.

At 2am my water broke and this meant that I had to go to the maternity as it was the point of no return. I had to give birth naturally or be provoked. I still had some contractions but the intensity and regularity did not warrant that I would give birth right away. So began the long arduous wait. At this point in time I was very anxious and wanted to get it over with already. Had the mid-wives provoke me with a lil bit of pill popping I would have been on my way but alas no they wanted to let nature take its course. Shrek accompanied me for the 12 hour wait which seemed more like several eternities to me. The contractions definitely calmed down and I then had to be provoked by injection of ocytoxin. Contractions came but my uterus collar had not dilated much. After several hours and endless contractions later the midwife who was assisting me found the cause my unpunctured water pocket had impeded Ben's descend and she was yo-yoing back and forth on this cushion which meant that labour could not get started properly. She promptly punctured the water pocket and I dilated much better. Time came for the finale: Push, push and push some more. Alas my pushing efforts were in vain because Miss ben was playing hide and seek and decided to look up at the sky instead of down below. She was in a transverse position and two gynecologists plus two midwives attempted to guide and change and twist and turn her to a more obliging position. Anyway two hours later, an out of breath and exhausted beyond belief me was finally assisted by the ventouse (suction cup/device) and with some screaming Ben was born. When I saw her head pushing through the threshold and I pushed a few more times so that she was completely detached from me save the umbilical chord I instinctively knew that it was over and there was a sense of soulagement and relief that brought all the months and hours leading up to this very moment worthwhile.

My overriding conclusion for Ben's pregnancy is that it was pain-stricken
before, during and after but it was definitely well worth it.

I am just glad that I can put all my pregnant and childbirth experiences behind me because Shrek has done a decent thing and ensured (to the best of his ability) I will not have to worry about contraception from now on. If all the previous hardship with childbirth and raising kids had not dampened my spirit and put a conclusive demise on my attitude towards having more kids then this one singular experience alone would be the final straw on the camel's back. No more.

So Benben one day I hope you will be able to read my thoughts and feelings regarding how you came into this world.

Lovingly yours,
mum

Affliction of being the first-born

Petit Suisse has been cursed with the affliction of being the first-born. Both Shrek and I can sympathise fully as I am a first-born from my first-born parents and so is Shrek. What this affliction dictates is that in Vietnamese tradition or more generally in all of society the eldest is supposed to lead by example and is burdened with the weight of grandiose expectations and responsibilities.

Shrek rejects this practice because he knows full well how he suffered as a result of this malediction: being looked up to and having to set an example for his younger siblings because if he failed then they would follow his bad example and collectively blunder and come asunder. But nevertheless Petit Suisse still has to carry a heavy load as he whether non-intentional or not gets yelled at the most and at times blamed for collective wrong-doings that are not entirely his fault. He is chided and disciplined when he disobeys because he whether we want to admit or not is still the beacon of example at the moment. He sets a precedence and in common law precedence is what dictates judgments of cases.

I do feel horrible when I lose my temper, yell or raise my voice with all my children. I am deeply sorry that I feel sometime I unfairly raise my voice and lose my patience more regularly with Petit Suisse. I have to remind myself that he is still only a tender age of 6. I would like to improve in this aspect. I want them and especially Petit Suisse to know that I do not have false and unrealistic or grandiose expectations lined up for him just because he is the oldest. I do not want favouritism to play a role. I would like to be as fair and just as possible with all four and want them to feel loved and supported always. I do want what is best for them and that is something that is unknown to me at this stage. I do not want to impose my will but simply want them to be guided and educated and taken care of to the best of my ability and capacity. I do want them to have fulfilled and meaningful lives and do what they love (although one has to be realistic about material gains and not be too fazed by drab reality)...

In short I do want to better myself and want my children to know that as flawed and imperfect as I am, my will is to give them my all and to communicate openly, honestly and share my wisdom, experiences and most of all I want to instill a sense of humour and optimism/hopefulness. I think humour and laughter can heal and ease the pain of most of life's harsh realities.

To be able to Laugh at yourself is an ability that does not come naturally or is not inherent in us. It comes with practice as Shrek will readily admit. Shrek has come leaps and bounds in this aspect as I will attest to a Shrek the Grinch when I first began living with him to a more personable and humane/humorous Shrek of present.