Action plus reaction

My faute majeure = lack of anticipation

Shrek's faute majeure = his reaction when confronted with my lack of anticipation

The combination of the above equation is explosive to say the least.

I had FAILED to inform Shrek 15 minutes before the ludothèque's (toy library) closing time. I had failed to get in contact with him in due time to allow him time to get to our agreed pick-up point. I had failed to prevoir and foresee that I needed change on me in case. I had also FAILED in telephoning Shrek at the most inappropriate time i.e. when he was backing out of our garage and his mobile was in his trousers pocket. In short I failed and fell short today. So the only thing left for me to do was to apologise which I did profusely but this is crucial as Shrek continued to berate, grate and faire la gueule as he only he can. I put up with all of that for about 15 minutes before I turned the table on Shrek and we had a screaming contest to see who would come out on top.

Lesson for me : anticipate, anticipate and anticipate some more, it has been drilled and droned into my brain !

Lesson for Shrek is of no less importance : DO not unnerve people by grating and nagging until they break.

Hopefully this painful episode served as a good lesson of what to avoid for Shrek and I.

Shrek realised he went overboard and apologised immediately.I accepted his apology and hope that we can avoid and bypass similar cases being repeated.

Mea culpa, mea culpa...

Digging a hole

Overheard on a chock-a-block, plein-à-croquer tram was the voice of a little boy

'J'ai vu des poux qui bouges sur ta tête' in reference to his sister's head.

As he wanted to ensure that the whole tram could hear this revelation, he repeated with zeal and I wanted to dig myself a hole and crawl into it to hide from embarrassment. I looked around and smiled meekly and weakly at my fellow passengers.

That boy with a big mouth was none other than Petit Suisse and he sure knows how to bring on total humiliation.

Good one boy !

I recounted this story to Shrek and he laughed uncontrollably...admittedly so did I.

My green thumb

Much to my incredulity and total diffidence re my ability to elevate and grow plants on my balcony. They did in fact not only survive but thrived gloriously as evidenced by the pictorial depictions/digital images above. Excuse the poor quality of my now defunct Olympus and sombre lighting (natural). It is a sight to behold, at least in my eyes.

I did not capture the images when the plants were in their full glory so I have to settle with less than desirable and second rate images, better that than none.

This one is for Shrek

They say that the best medecine is laughter and I would tend to agree. Hence I bring you my outrageously self-depreciating gaffe. I washed a toy electronic steering wheel with water and it went wonky and began playing music by itself until we removed the batteries. Needless to say Shrek had a good laugh at my expense. I am glad I can be of service and spontaneously ignite such a round of hearty laugh. Being ridiculed is good as a mood lightener sometime!
You would know all about this wouldn't you Shrek?


I know now it is much better and wiser to wipe it with a wet cloth or sponge and be done with it.

Lil update

. My poor plants have been frost-bitten and left for dead on the balcony, hidden from sight and hence 'loin de yeux, loin de coeur'. Much to my relief I do not have to care for the plants anymore, not that I ever claimed to have a green thumb.

On the contrary I have always been a disparaging death maiden to plants !!

Plants that are healthy and full of vigour come within my reach and live under the same roof as I and then it only spells disaster for the plants as they wither and waste away: a slow and painful bereavement. I do not know what it is about plants or me that refuse to cooperate and co-exist harmoniously under the same roof. I would really like to keep them alive and flourishing if only they had the heart to collaborate and not self-destruct the way they do in my presence. Woe woe woe is me...

I will post pictorial proof if I do eventually get around to photographing dead plants.

Random lessons I have learnt

I will pass this lesson onto my kids.

Never ever buy rice creole. It is a punishment from GOD and this is one very important lesson that they will thank me for. Even if people offer it as a present do not be silly enough to acccept for you will be at a lost as to what the hell to do with it to make it taste good. Rice creole tasting good is not an option.

As for me my lesson has been learnt.

My annoying habit

In order to play it fair I will reveal that I am guilty of over-stuffing the washing machine and this annoys the hell outta Shrek. He believes that my doing so will render the machine less efficient and the clothes less clean as a consequence. Also he is outraged that I have not changed this BAD HABIT of mine.

to be continued...

trivia

A little piece of tidbit about how ungainly or awkward I really am. I once used an eyeliner pencil to outline my eyebrow. After I had drawn the line I was horrified to note that the line was a ghastly dark green. It took me all of 15 minutes or so of scrubbing and excessive amounts of makeup remover before the line began to fade.

Needless to say I have learned from this faux pas.

I am nothing if not une championne de faux pas and proud of it!