Messages les plus consultés

jeudi 31 mai 2007

Matterhorn




The majestic Matterhorn atop Zermatt, one of the many famous Swiss Alpes. Switzerland lacks many things such as open-mindedness, multiculturalism, political liberalism but it more than makes up for all of its shortcomings with naturally magnificent landscapes.

Petit Suisse

Constant naggings of the following sort are worse than tantrum-throwing or hissy fits.

Petit Suisse to me : You do not give me ... You do not give me ... You do not love me at all. You do not love me at all.

etc...

Alternate between the above two sentences and fill in the blanks with whatever he is desiring on the spur of the moment. Elongate the length of this constant nagging by an half hour and I am at my wits end. The worst thing is I do not want to cave in and give him whatever it is he wants which consists mostly of impossible,unreasonable or tooth-decaying foodstuff. What is an exasperated mother to do?

Readiness

Who knew that my husband's definition of being ready involves wait for it, having shoes on?

This means one thing I could be nude and be ready if my feet were shoed.
He is seriously worried that if we were to have an earthquake or any natural disaster or unnatural emergency and I was shoeless this would be a catastrophe.
As one knows to be found without ones shoes on the street when one is sans-abri is unforgiveable due to possible debris, broken objects and what not...

So he habitually tells me (much to my annoyance) that I am not ready unless I've got my shoes ON.

You begin to see where all our problems stem from, don't you?

jeudi 24 mai 2007

Petite Suissesse

The reason I have blogged less about my petite suissesse is simple. She is a pigheaded, ultra-determined and tough little 2 year old who other than repeating endlessly after her older brother is just a normal kid. This does in no way mean she is not extra special or unique in her own sweet way. It just means that for the moment her daily encumbrances are less noteworthy.

Random conversations with Petit Suisse

My four year old son shall be referred to as 'Petit Suisse' and my 2+ year old daughter shall be known as 'Petite Suissesse'.

Petit Suisse to self : This morning I was a wee little baby and I suckled on your breasts for milk.

Self thinking must be some growth-hormone induced milk because you have miraculously grown in a matter of a few hours to a four year old.

Petit Suisse's sense/notion of past is reduced to 'this morning or a moment ago'.

mardi 22 mai 2007

Struggling to find an audience

My fears of not striking a chord with any soul out there who desires to express and share their views that do not already seem formulaic and conform to the myriad blogs that already exist. Maybe I came into this game a little late. I will persist no matter and if it means simply to be a platform to express my views then so be it.

To hell with attempting to appeal to the masses.

I now sound desperate for attention.
;)

Butterfly





Fleeting beauty
Oh how I envy thee!
Fluttering, flippant, coloured wings

Ephemeral beauty
Oh to live a short-lived wingspan
'Tis more than a lifetime of inutility

Epitome of fragility
Oh such pitiful fate of all existence
'Tis more than mere inexistence

---

Butterfly how thou hath conjured up
My own short-lived existentialism
Like the many before I

To have lived is far better
... than to have simply existed

mercredi 16 mai 2007

Bored

I would welcome suggestions on what to do when one is bored in the pretend metropole but in reality a village 'Geneva'.

I do not expect a constant flow of ideas because it really is deadly boring here.

What to feed one of the world's most finicky eaters?

The following is an exhaustive list of what my finicky eater of a son will eat. Anything that does not appear in the list will not be eaten.
In no particular order
1. Carrots
2. Peas
3. Chocolate (for breakfast, lunch and dinner and snacks if only he could)
4. Pasta without any sauce
5. Rice when accompanied by char siu or lap suong
6. Fried rice
7. Yoghurt
8. Fruits the sweeter the better/more likely to be eaten
9. Corn kernels (he will eat cans upon cans of this)
10. Vietnamese beef noodle soup

The pattern is that he associates good taste with high sugar content. If it tastes sweet then it tastes good according to this gourmand. Needless to say he does not have a very big appetite.

For a petit Swiss who does not appreciate one single bite of cheese of any kind is a shame really. He doesn't take to milk fat too well so rule out butter or dairy products other than yoghurt and milk which unusually he drinks (especially when flavoured with chocolate powder).

mardi 15 mai 2007

Oral sex more cancerous than ciggies ?

Giving multiple head/blow jobs or more scientifically correct fellatios or cunnilingus to different partners will increase your risk of throat cancer. This risk is calculated to be more substantial than smoking or consuming alcohol. A study by the University of Baltimore revealed that practising oral sex with more than five partners raises the risk of developping throat cancer five times. Rest assured that the majority who contract oral infection arising out of oral sex will probably not develop throat cancer. Reassuring init?


The experts advise that if you want to continue giving and receiving head/blow jobs without feeling guilty or anxious about your elevated risk factor then wear a condom.

Sorry if I have offended anyone with this particularly blunt post.

I was momentarily tempted to put a visual exhibition to illustrate my point but thought better of it.

lundi 14 mai 2007

To sell or not to sell : my soul that is



I have hesitated or procrastinated for a good few years before finally kickstarting my first blog. The main reason being I wasn't too sure if selling out my soul to the web community is what I really wanted.

I stumbled upon the world of blogs accidentally one day while I was googling a recipe of some sort. Yes typical of a temporary housewife (I hate this word with a vengeance) to be searching for what else but new recipes to try out. Since then I have periodically scanned different blogs, some food blogs, some that I think are humorous and some just ridiculous.

The majority of the blogs are self-confessional. It is an attention grabbing tool but can at the same time mask the identity and maintain anonimity of the author if he or she so chooses. Everywhere I turn there is a new blog whose owner is in talks for a book contract. It seems that these days literary genius or the mastery of language are no longer prerequisites for would be authors. Publishing companies are undermining literary values to sign book contracts with anyone who has a juicy story to tell. It matters not whether the story revolves around mundane subjects or extraordinary matters so long as it will sell books.

Money and Fame,it seems are what we all ultimately seek. I would be the first to admit that I would not turn down monetary offers of any kind if they indeed come my way.

So here on my little niche on the web I sell my soul to the highest bidder. Let the bidding begin.

mercredi 9 mai 2007

Blackmail

How young does someone need to be in order to perfect the art of blackmail. It is truly an artform.
Any guesses yet?

Will give you the answer when I've got some guesses coming my way...


The simple answer is a toddler from approximately 2 years onwards.

A housewife's salary estimated to be worth 168 000 Swiss Francs

How I beamed with glee when my husband gave me an article published in the newspaper about actual monetary estimates of a housewife's worth: a hypothetical salary of 168 000 Swiss Francs per year. To any woman who thinks that all her unpaid, under-appreciated workload that seems to never end 'This article gives you vindication!' The study by the American institute Salary.com based its findings on 40 000 females. Ten different careers are associated with a housewife of which two are my standout favourites : that of CEO and psychologist.

According to this study I am earning more than my husband. Somehow it is a bit of a denouement because at the end of the day I still feel exhausted, overworked and most important of all unpaid. So much for my hypothetical salary of 168 000 Francs.

dimanche 6 mai 2007

Children

Passion...Desire

Simple lust!

A woman's womb encircles
A mother's womb cradles
The little seed of love
Confounded by simple lust

A nouveau soul meeting the world
Bound by conventions

Flightless wings
Ruptured
Broken
Bleak


Darkness.