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jeudi 22 janvier 2009
My bank book cannot be considered full but there are a myriad of other things in my household which could be described as such. The kitchen sink for instance is always full of dirty pots, pans and dishes. The laundry basket is overwhelmingly full of soiled clothes, linen and so forth. My apartment is full of noisy laughter and at times full of tearful tantrum hissy fits. My letterbox is full of crappy ads and monthly bills that incessantly arrive. My basement is full of needless crap that our family has accumulated over the years.My kitchen is full of useless gadgets. My pantry is full of sugar hits for my sweet cravings.
Sometime my home resembles a battlefield that has been hit by bombers and is certainly full of chaos and disorder.
The most important fulfilment is that at the end of a tiring and thoroughly exhausting day I do feel that it is full of love. I do want my children to feel that eventhough their mum might have lost her patience with them that ultimately she thinks that they are worth the sacrifices that she has made -career wise and otherwise and that she loves them in all earnesty.
I do want my children to be able to read this blog one day and feel proud of their mum. They need to know that no matter what their mum loved and loves them wholeheartedly.
I had a tendency to be much more optimistic before having children but the older I am the more pessimistic I have become. I think idealism has been unfortunately quashed by harsh reality. I do however believe that children need to follow their own paths and pursue their dreams...importance lies in trying and giving it your all. The end result sometime can be disheartening but being resilient and resistant enough to go on is what differentiates a doer from a nay-sayer.